Failed

I can't believe my stupid car failed its inspection. That necessitated
an entire day of driving around looking for a fucking workshop since
my road tax was expiring next week.

And what did this reliable car fail? It's wheel alignment test. I
haven't even driven it very much.

And then I sent it for servicing since I was already at the workshop.
To be told this one need to change that one need to change.

Owning a car is such an expensive endeavour.

Twins!!!

Well not really but thought it was weird that they'd want to sit next
to each other. They're strangers. Maybe I've got BO today and that's
why the guy on the right changed seat. Tragic.

I should just give in and go for proper liposuction. Exercise is just
too much work.

Rain rain go away

It's raining. How am I supposed to go to work in the pouring rain?

All these problems would be a thing of the past.

ONCE I GET MY CAR THAT IS.

Be still my heart

My agent sms-ed me to tell me COE bidding was successful -- it went up over S$2,000 to 20+k!!!! I'm so glad I already put in my order.

 

With COE in hand, all that remains is to wait, wait and wait. Until May when it arrives.

 

It's only January. The wait is agonizing. I thought it wouldn't be an issue, but like my friend said, we live in a society of instant gratification. One expects that once something is bought, you get your grubby hands on it as soon as possible. May is like a millenia away. Sigh.

 

In the meantime I just have to be content with pictures. Like this one.

 

It's so pretty isn't it?

 

I've seen a couple on the road already -- the first few to appear. It's heart stopping.

 

One review mentioned that the twin exhaust snorts if you push it a little. That's the "boomz" sound I encountered when I test drove the car, which is what led me to pick it. How can you not buy something which goes "boomz"??

Tower Madness Zero

Or is it Tower Menace Zero.

I've been obsessed about this game since last Saturday when Nic
introduced it to me.

It's an obscenely addictive game.

The thing is I kinda suck at it. I don't know what to do with those
aliens that split. And those red aliens that split. I just keep dying.

Re: Jogjakarta

I have really lousy procrastinating habits. The worst of which, I
think, is the fact that my pictures are just everywhere. I've never
really gotten around to organising them.

I really should.

But who's got the time?

Here's one I stole from YL. Yummy isn't it.

I should add that for lunch, I had STEAK and FRIES with CHAMPAGNE.

Oh the wine snobs would frown upon this.

But it was good, and I think one can drink whatever one feels like
whenever one feels like it.

I'm into my champagne phase now. I hope it'll pass. It's costing a
fortune.

Wee. Target for Week 1 achieved.

But of course the beginning is always the simplest. It'll just take
CNY and all that bakkwa to destroy about 6 weeks of work.

Maybe I need to go running in M'sia.

Sigh. Just blew yet some more money upgrading the suspension of my car.

As a result of which I have to wait even longer. Now we're looking at
delivery in May,

Sadness.

The weight loss program is off to a promising start.

 

For the past 2 weeks I've been going to my usual liposuction twice a week, and then on top of that running twice a week.

 

I don't really know how long I can keep this up seeing as I absolutely hate runnning. Hate x 10. It's so torturous.

 

Maybe I've got the setting too high relative to my fitness level.

 

The target is to lose 8.5 kg by the end of April, where hopefully I'm off to either Australia or the States to do a wine and food tour.  I have 44 days of leave to clear this year. I can bring forward 16, but that still leaves me with 28 days to clear. Which is still more than what some people have in 2 years.

The deed is done

I finally caved in last Sunday and ordered myself the VW Scirocco 1.4 TSI as they were having a sort of promotion on it. The basic Golf was better value, but the Scirocco just tugged on my heart strings that wee bit more. And as for the BMW, well, I can always get a BMW when I get older can't I.

 

Having told the salesman that I don't mind waiting for the car (the later the better), I was told that delivery is scheduled for April or May.

 

Except that now, after I bought it, I'm growing increasingly impatient to get it!!!!!!

 

I've now been deciding whether I should go ahead to get the Dynamic Chassis Control, a S$3,000 option which allows me to select whether the suspension should be normal, comfortable, or sporty. As with all options, these are worthless once you sell the car. Initial feedback suggests that I should get it nonetheless.

 

Decisions decisions decisions.

Fear of failure

Sometimes I look at all the senior directors and I think to myself a number of things.

Wow. How do I stay so motivated for the next 20 years.

Wow. How do I ever become as zai as them.

Wow. How do I ever become as confident as them.

The directors' handbook says that our goal is to demonstrate: "..maturity, sound judgment...". I'm like -- wow. How am I going to do that.

So many thoughts cross my mind. I'm afraid that I'll never measure up; that I'll be a failure.

The past couple of weeks have been rather unsettling at work. I'm still adjusting to my new role, the enormity of which has yet to set in. The responsibilities. How will I develop the business. How will I generate new revenue. How do I maximise the productivity of the staff. And my own flagging productivity.

It's causing me some restless nights. And I've been floating around the office in a semi sort of daze.

I look at the other newly appointed directors. They all look so self assured and confident. Their faces say: "yes, this is for me. I'm ready to take the challenge head on."

Mine just seems to say: "oh my god what have I gotten myself into."

And no one can help me except me. I'm all on my own.

Resolutions

I've recently resolved to try to set a new target, as I'm about to sign up for a fresh liposuction package at the gym.

So. Each package is 30 sessions. That takes is to about mid-April. Ideally I need to lose another 8 kg or so -- actually 13, but I think 8 would be fine.

So. If I lose .5 kg a week, that's about 16 weeks. Which is about right.

The problem is that I've been told that to get rid of 0.5 kg of fat, you have to somehow lose 3500 calories. So I have to create a calorie deficit of 3500 calories a week!

Sounds easy doesn't it. But it's not. Each session at the gym burns about 350 calories. Say I go 4 x a week, which is my current target. That's only 1400 calories, which leaves 2100 calories. I.e. one day's calories for a sedentary lifestyle like mine.

Bottom line. Oh my god I have to start a diet.

This and that

Funny, I think I just received an expression of interest today from an acquaintance from London who says she'll be posted here between March and September. 

Isn't it great what power can bring you.

I've recently diagnosed the cause of my lack of motivation. Or rather, maybe someone else diagnosed it for me.

It's that I've become too comfortable in my little zone. I need to become more uncomfortable again.

I need:

1. Financial pain. So I need to buy a new house. After the new car that is.

2. Defined targets instead of fluffy wishy washy ones. Like say, a listing in a recognised ranking magazine by the time I'm...32? Hm. Is that too soon? Maybe 33. Need to get the name out there. 

I get a bit lazy and complacent at times. I need to surround myself with driven people. I need to be put in place and feel embarrassed by my stupidity. I need to feel inadequate. All these have always been factors which have driven me. Without these I'd have been selling pork in a butchery somewhere (I've always maintained that I look like a ter bak seller without my specs). 

3. Like my good friend who is ever so committed to finding the love of his life by the time he's 32 (which leaves him less than 8 months) -- indeed, it was all he could talk on and on (and on) about during our recent Jogja trip, I probably need to start thinking about this hitherto undeveloped part of my life.

So. That sounds like a bunch of New Year resolutions to me. I've got others:

(a) need to get off my butt and sort out my insurances, since as of 1 Jan 2010 I'm no longer covered under the staff insurance policy, since, well, I'm no longer staff. Therefore I have ZERO medical coverage at the moment.

(b) that ties in with the need to become a Permanent Resident. I suppose I need to get that in order. There are just so many forms to fill. 

(c) plan my holidays for 2010. I've got 46 days of leave this year. I don't know how I'm going to clear all that leave. If I took it all I'd be almost not working for 2 / 12 months. That's bad, since I need to be working very hard to boost my internal rankings at the end of the year. Which sort of determines the amount of dosh coming my way.

Work work work. Plod plod plod.

Oh and I told my gym instructor that I need to be setting new goals for the year. Seems I've been stagnant for 4 months. That's bad.

Haven't had much updates recently. Went to Jogjakarta for a short
holiday over the New Year weekend. It was quite tiring, with early
morning wake ups on 3/5 days (2.45 am, 4.45 am, 5.30 am). It's now 11
pm and I'm about to collapse in bed.

It's been a productive day of sorts. I went to test drive 2 more cars:
the BMW 318i and the VW Scirocco 1.4 TSI.

Drivewise the Scirocco beats the BMW hands down. It positively rapes
the BMW in terms of drivability. So I really like it. In fact I had
this cheesy smile on my face throughout the test drive. With each gear
change the exhaust sort of gave a little explosive noise; which served
to make my grin even wider.

The BMW on the other hand, was generally a very uninspiring; boring
drive. It's good no doubt, but lacks character.

The problem is that the price differential quite tiny. I'm told there
will be a CNY promotion, and that the price will bring it within 15k
of the price of the Scirocco.

The BMW marque is nothing to be sniffed at. In Redrapture's own words,
BMW is +10000 points whereas the VW is only +5000. The parents are of
course highly enthusiastic about the BMW; because of course what
screams more financial success to the relatives than a BMW?

But since I'm not really going to drive it back so far, I don't think
that's a factor. Unless they want to subsidize my purchase, which
entails different considerations altogether.

The Scirocco is also smaller, and doesn't have back doors. I'm too
short to reach the seatbelts without stupidly having to sort of
stretch back to grab it. The back seats are short. Everything about it
screams that it is not meant for practicality.

The BMW on the other hand screams practicality. Hugeass boot. Good
backseat space. Quality interiors. And have I mentioned it's a BMW?
BUT IT DOESN'T MAKE ME HAVE A CHEESY SMILY WHEN DRIVING IT!!!

Ultimately it's a case of the head vs heart. As usual. Only this time
I think the heart's going to win.