New Musical Terms

ALLREGRETTO 
     When you're 16 measures into the piece and realize you took too fast a tempo 

ANGUS DEI 
     To play with a divinely beefy tone 

A PATELLA 
     Accompanied by knee-slapping 

APPOLOGGIATURA 
     A composition that you regret playing 

APPROXIMATURA 
     A series of notes not intended by the composer, yet played with an "I meant to do that" attitude 

APPROXIMENTO 
     A musical entrance that is somewhere in the vicinity of the correct pitch 

CACOPHANY 
     A composition incorporating many people with chest colds 

CORAL SYMPHONY 
     A large, multi-movement work from Beethoven's Caribbean Period 

FERMANTRA 

     A note held over and over and over and over and . . . 

FERMOOTA 
     A note of dubious value held for indefinite length 

FIDDLER CRABS 
     Grumpy string players 

FLUTE FLIES 
     Those tiny that bother musicians on outdoor gigs 

FRUGALHORN 
     A sensible and inexpensive brass instrument 

GAUL BLATTER 
     A French horn player 

GREGORIAN CHAMP 
     The title bestowed upon the monk who can hold a note the longest 

GROUND HOG 
     Someone who takes control of the repeated bass line and won't let anyone else play it 

PLACEBO DOMINGO 
     A faux tenor 

SPRITZICATO 

     An indication to string instruments to produce a bright and bubbly sound 

TEMPO TANTRUM 
     What an elementary school orchestra is having when it's not following the conductor 

TROUBLE CLEF 
     Any clef one can't read: e.g., alto clef for pianists 

VESUVIOSO 
     An indication to build up to a fiery conclusion 

VIBRATTO 
     Child prodigy son of the concertmaster 

I can't believe I've got a date for Sunday brunch arising out of an
alcohol tasting. That was completely unexpected.

Clarithromycin

Ever since that stupid old man coughed on me making me swear of public
transport, I've been having coughing fits. It's gotten worse so I've
finally taken to seeing the doctor. There are a thousand and one
reasons why I usually don't see the doctor. I usually just tell people
that I don't like to take drugs unless I really have to.

The REAL reason though, is because I'm afraid they'll turn my teeth
yellow thus flushing my toothwhitening efforts down the drain.

Anyway, it didn't seem as if it was getting any better so I've finally
gone to see the doctor, who suspects that I might have mycoplasma, a
debilitating bacterial infection spread by fluids from the lungs
(stupid old man's fault).

The drug seems to be working -- I've been coughing up tons of phlegm.

Still, Clarithromycin has a number of side effects, the most prominent
of which is loose stools.

And so I've been walking around feeling as if I'm about to leak from
my back end. It sucks. I've cancelled all my weekend activities.

And on that note, a note of advice to all people who have to buy
toilet paper:

Just because it says 3-ply doesn't mean that it's good toilet paper.

My butt feels as if it's been sandpapered.

CUTIE COMPACT TOILET ROLL, I'LL NEVER BETRAY YOU AGAIN!!!!

"Bro" part II

Furthermore, it doesn't seem to have very pleasant connotations. According to Urbandictionary.com, it could have one of the following meanings:

"Obnoxious partying males who are often seen at college parties. When they aren't making an ass of themselves they usually just stand around holding a red plastic cup waiting for something exciting to happen so they can scream something that demonstrates how much they enjoy partying."

"An alpha male idiot. This is the derogatory sense of the word (common usage in the western US): white, 16-25 years old, inarticulate, belligerent, talks about nothing but chicks and beer, drives a jacked up truck that's plastered with stickers, has rich dad that owns a dealership or construction business and constantly tells this to chicks at parties, is into extreme sports that might be fun to do but are uncool to claim (wakeboarding, dirt biking, lacrosse), identifies excessively with brand names, spends a female amount of money on clothes and obsesses over his appearance to a degree that is not socially acceptable for a heterosexual male."

"Stupid white trash guys in the 909 with lifted trucks, wife beaters, shitty music (usually the most popular rap, hardcore, and nowadays emo) ugly girlfriends, ugly hair, mouths constantly open, retarded as all get up, have no common sense, think its cool to park half on the curb half off, put Flowmaster exhausts on Nissan Hardbodies and Toyota longbeds, don't realize that a huge lift job and giant tires fucks up your gears, which in turn equals less power"

"A version of a bra specifically designed for men." --WHAT THE HELL??

"Bro"

When did this word become part of English lingo?

I've only noticed it being used in the last year.

"Bro, can I ask you a favour"

"This is a good deal Bro"

"Bro, how's the burger?"

"Thanks Bro"

I've also noticed it has become more prevalent after the show How I
Met Your Mother, but that must be a coincidence.

Everyone's using it, except me. What's a "Bro" and when did I become a
"Bro"?

It can't be youngbie lingo, since it's been used on me by like 40+
year old men.

Also, it's a term always used by men, never women.

Is it army lingo maybe?

I'm so out of touch with the real world.

Wine buddies

Looking for wine buddies to go out with on a once / week or once / 2
weeks basis. Must not be into plonk or glugging. In terms of taste in
red wine, must prefer more refined and subdued wine rather than fruit
bombs. In terms of taste in white wine, I'm easy. Price points that
I'm comfortable with: between 50 - 130 / bottle. Anyone wants to apply?

I have one friend that I regularly go out with, but he's now told me
that he's into reducing his wine budget. And he's into fruit bombs. So
I'm not sure if our tastes are compatible.

Sigh.

In with the new

Out with the old

(recycling to make way for newer trendier clothes)

Shoppaholic

I've said it before and I'll say it again. These pc fairs are evil.
While waiting for the fair to open I promptly went on a shopping spree
at dockers, the first shop I saw, only to discover that Gap has much
nicer stuff at cheaper prices. Grrrrr. So I bought stuff from gap too.

I love how gap's clothes are like in US sizes. I mean I really don't
think I'm size S. But I'm swimming in an M. And according to Gap I've
got a tiny waist size. Hmmmmmm. I love Gap.

Sent from my iPhone

Eyes damn tired. Sigh. The price of vanity

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God this sounds awful

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KSnda5-o654&feature=related

He's going to lose his voice soon. His technique is completely off.

Mr. Grumpy

My colleagues bought this for me. They're so funny

How embarrassing at the petrol station I didn't know how to open my
petrol tank...

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